Yelle will headline Emma May Ball, with support from Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaurs.

Gaga at John’s? Kanye at Queens’? There are a lot of rumours flying about, but don’t worry: The Tab is on hand to help you sort the wheat from the chaff. We’re fairly sure Gaga and Kanye won’t be coming to Cambridge any time soon, but we will be bringing you the latest confirmed acts from across Cambridge as well as the best rumours and gossip about all the Balls.

If you have any inside info that you want to share, or have heard any rumours, let us know at news@cambridgetab.co.uk, and don’t forget to get involved in our comment section.

——————————————————————————————

Saturday, 18 June, 12.30

French band Yelle will headline Emmanuel May Ball.

Their May Ball committee left a cunning trail of clues on their website pointing to the electro-pop band. Yelle released their second album, Safari Disco Club, earlier this year and supported Katy Perry on her UK tour.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QYaq19ywGdo

Elsewhere, Emmanuel’s newsletter Roar! revealed that Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaurs will also be appearing at the Planets-themed Ball. Earlier this term we revealed that producer and DJ TEED had to pull out of John’s because of other commitments, but it seems Emmanuel have managed to hang on to him!

Friday, 17 June, 18.52

Clare have released their full line up, confirming that Tinchy Stryder will indeed be headlining their ball.

He will be supported by Ms. Dynamite, the UK garage singer who launched a comeback last year with her popular collaboration with DJ Zinc.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OKB3hJBvAZY

Also appearing on the line up will be up-and-coming UK singer Yasmin, who has had 3 top 40 UK singles including one collaboration with Rapper Devlin. Finishing off the night will be The Correspondents and United Vibrations.

Thursday, 16 June, 11.26

Northern rockers Futureheads will headline Pembroke May Ball.

The 4 piece, known for their hit cover “Hounds Of Love”, released their fourth album The Chaos last year.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fcMAM9B7yAA

They will have support from Cloud Control, a band from down under who have recently won the Australian version of the Mercury music prize and can count Radio 1 DJ Nick Grimshaw among their fans.

Also on the line up will be electro-percussive sextet The Other Tribe and DJ John B, who has been voted the 2nd best Drum’n’Bass DJ in the world.

Monday, 13 June, 16.17

Rapper Professor Green will be headlining Jesus May Ball.

Jesus announced their lineup to ticket holders via email this afternoon.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=506ThtC-GI4

Professor Green – Before I Die

Professor Green will be joined by Simon Amstell, who became a household name as the presenter of Popworld of Channel 4 and BBC2’s Never Mind the Buzzcocks.

Jesus will also host performances by Scratch Perverts, David’s Lyre, and Clean Bandit.

Monday, 13 June, 12.05

The Mystery Jets will be headlining Magdalene May Ball.

The British indie band, who have released three hugely successful albums, will return from a US tour to headline Magdalene, as announced on the Ball’s website at noon today.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K2Dl3VQ2K2U

The Mystery Jets – Two Doors Down

They will be followed by Jamie XX, a member of The XX who has turned solo.

Magdalene will also host performances by The Joker & The Thief, Clean Bandit, and touring DJs Itchy Feet.

Music Officer Mike Eason told The Tab: “We’re massively excited to have two fantastic British acts headlining our main stage for the centenary ball.

“We have a few little surprises up our sleeve to make this ball one of the most memorable to date, all that’s left to do now is buy the riders (I wish).”

Read The Tab‘s interview with The Mystery Jets here.

Sunday, 12 June, 21.29

Booty Luv will be first to take to Trinity May Ball’s main stage.

Ents Officer Alex McLeod revealed that the dance group will be appearing at Trinity on CamFM this evening. The double act, who were both originally members of Big Brovas, will be followed by singer-songwriter Labrinth.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u98kNNtofFs

Labrinth – Let the Sunshine

Labrinth has previously collaborated with Tiny Tempah, and will be launching his album at Trinity’s May Ball.

Alex also confirmed that Cascada will be headlining, as reported by The Tab earlier this month.

Take our poll below to let us know who you think has bagged the best act:

Sunday, 12 June, 20.47

Radio 1 DJ Huw Stephens will headline Downing’s dance tent.

President Sophie Wawro appeared live on CamFM this evening, and also announced that The Lady Gaga Experience will be making an appearance. Sophie described them as “the best Gaga tribute act around.”

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qh_zU7lqjQc&feature=fvst

The Lady Gaga Experience – Bad Romance

Sophie also confirmed The Tab‘s suspicion that Chase and Status will be headlining, saying: “Well done, The Tab. You were right!”

What’s more, she confirmed that Darwin Deez will be playing, adding that his rider includes: vegan crisps, avocados, canned chick peas, two boxes of cereal, and local postcards with stamps. Obviously.

Sunday, 12 June, 16.00

Big Boi will headline St John’s 500th anniversary May Ball.

One half of Outkast and a solo artist in his own right, Big Boi will be supported by MOBO award-winning artist Chipmunk and, as we guessed, Patch William.

Atlanta rapper Big Boi released his debut solo album Sir Lucious Left Foot: The Son of Chico Dusty last year, which spawned the international hit ‘Shutterbug’.

Big Boi is also booked to headline the West Holt Stage on the Saturday of this year’s Glastonbury, less than a week after appearing at John’s.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rWsvkW6rKkQ

Big Boi- Shutterbug

Ents Officer George Johnston told us: “We didn’t want to book the standard British University act for our 500th anniversary. Big Boi is an international superstar who rarely performs in England and we jumped at the chance to get him to grace New Court with his Glastonbury headlining set.

“For any Outkast fans out there, Big Boi will be delving into his extensive back catalogue, and if even that’s too alternative for you, Chipmunk will be representing for UK pop while Patch William will be one for the indie fans.”

Chipmunk, whose single ‘Oopsy Daisy’ topped the Charts back in 2009, has recently released his second album Transition, while Patch William will release their debut album later this year, and boast Stephen Fry as one of their fans. The national treasure tweeted about the band: “Might Patch William be the next big thing? They seem rather wonderful to me.”

Elsewhere, London DJ and producer Erol Alkan will headline the Dance tent with support from TC and upcoming house producer Ray Foxx.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IAS_9kOhzyk&feature=player_embedded

Erol Alkan on the decks

Erol Alkan was Mixmag’s ‘DJ of the Year’ in 2006 and Datatransmissions ‘DJ of the Year’ in both 2008 and 2009.

Cambridge natives will also be out in force for the ball. Truly Medley Deeply, Ellafunks, Staircase Band, Clean Bandit and ex-Cantab comic Liam Williams will all be performing throughout the night. Clean Bandit vocalist and Tab favourite Sseg told The Tab that this year the band would be “bringing visuals.”

See the full lineup on the St John’s Ents website here and make sure you tune in to Cam FM’s May Ball reveal show tonight from 8pm-10pm on 97.2 FM to hear an exclusive interview with Chipmunk, as well as finding out who else will be joining Cascada at Trinity.

Take our poll below and let us know what you think of the John’s line up.

Saturday, 11 June, 13.36

The Tab can exclusively reveal that King Charles and Gentlemen’s Dub Club will be headlining Robinson.

Indie up-and-comer King Charles will top the bill at Robinson, fresh from supporting Mumford & Sons on their recent US tour. His first album will be released later this year and Robinson reckon he will be “a festival sensation this summer.”

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JN_cOsjErDE

King Charles- Love Lust

Supporting him will be Gentlemen’s Dub Club, a nine-piece band from Leeds who play a combination of “dub, roots-reggae and back-beat ska”, according to organisers.

Ents Officer Josh Brookes told The Tab: “We are more than excited to be having two of the most promising upcoming acts on the UK live scene.

“Both Gentlemen’s Dub Club and King Charles have fast growing reputations as stunning live performers and we are sure that guests at Robinson will see why.”

Robinson have also bagged comedian Seann Walsh for their ‘Guardians of the Realm’ themed ball.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k99Bv7ueBfA

Seann Walsh on ‘people watching’

Winner of Chortle’s ‘Newcomer of the Year’ in 2009, Walsh has appeared on Mock the Week and Michael McIntyre’s Comedy Roadshow, and has made a name for himself as a stand up.

The performers will appear alongside Jakwob, who we revealed earlier this term would be performing at the Ball.

Thursday, 9 June, 11.40

Jessie J has turned down not one but two May Balls.

Rumour has it that Jessie J was in negotiations with both Jesus and St John’s, but both negotiations fell through over price.

Jesus were allegedly close to sealing the deal in December, but Jessie J’s price doubled after she won the Brit Critics’ Choice Award, making her too pricey for them. Jesus wouldn’t confirm anything, saying they can’t comment on “confidential discussions with artists and agencies.”

Price tag too high?

Meanwhile, John’s found themselves in a similar situation earlier this year. Negotiations fell though after Jessie J’s single Price Tag went to number one, and her price went up as a result.

Ents Officer George Johnston told us: “We were in talks but unfortunately, after Price Tag went to number her price tag went through the roof. The agent didn’t seem to see the irony.”

Tuesday, 7 June, 19.10

Students perform at May Balls every year, but one performer has taken it to another level.

Singer/songwriter Kitty Norman will this year be performing at not one but six May Balls during May Week, including three in one evening!

Kitty, who is taking a year out from studying Theology at Sidney Sussex, will play Trinity, Clare, Jesus, St John’s, Magdalene and Homerton.

“To be honest I cannot wait for the challenge”, Kitty told us, “I am going to have to be very disciplined in getting enough sleep, which will probably mean having to become a little nocturnal. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t a tad anxious about that Monday Night!”

“I couldn’t say which balls I’m most anticipating because I have not yet performed at a May Ball”, Kitty said, “but judging by my experience of Sidney Sussex May Ball last year, I can’t wait.

“At the moment I’ve been playing around London, to quite intimate crowds in clubs and bars. Having a larger, younger crowd, with more people I recognise, will definately be a lot more intense and nerve-wracking, but way more exciting!

“I really can’t wait for John’s ball though, and have managed to bag myself a ticket for the evening. It’s all set to be amazing. No booze for me though!”

Check out Kitty’s Myspace to listen to her songs, there’s a good chance you’ll see her at some point during May Week!

Monday, 6 June, 20.01

If you’re curious to find out who’s playing John’s before you go-go, we’ve heard a rumour that John’s are in negotiations with Wham! to headline.

Are Wham! go-going to John’s?

After early rumours of Lady Gaga, it now looks like George Michael and co. could grace St John’s New Court stage to celebrate their quincentenary. But the rumour seems a little far fetched; last year George Michael ruled out the possibility of aWham! reunion, and it would be a bit of a surprise if they launched their comeback at John’s. But you never know, it is the 500th after all…

A little more realistically, we’ve also heard rumblings about the possibility of Example taking the top spot at John’s.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T9yGcKlYAiw

The London rapper, who releases his third album later this year, has had hits with songs such as ‘Kickstarts’, ‘Watch The Sun Come Up’ and ‘Won’t Go Quietly’. He’s also got a nice gap in his tour schedule on the 21st, could be making a stop in Cambridge to celebrate John’s 500th?

Saturday, 4 June, 19.05

American Indie kid Darwin Deez will play Downing. But don’t quote us on that.

Darwin Deez let slip in an email to fans that he’ll be coming coming to Cambridge on the 21st, but didn’t specify the college. St John’s, Downing and Queens’ are all holding their balls on the 21st this year, but Queens’ have confirmed that Deez won’t be playing at their Ball, narrowing it down to just two.

John’s and Downing are both remaining tight lipped about their line up, leaving us guessing as to where exactly he’ll be playing. Our guess is Downing, but we’ll just have to wait and see!

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8pbdLqTh_x4

After his initially slip up, Deez was also careful not to give anything away. He told The Tab: “It’s suppose to be a secret and I wasn’t meant to publicise it apparently!”

Darwin Deez released his debut self-titled album last year and was featured in the top 10 of NME‘s annual cool list. Read The Tab‘s interview with him here.

Friday, 3 June, 12.10

Drum and Bass producer TC will be appearing at St John’s May Ball.

The London based DJ made the announcement on his Myspace, and it’s likely he’ll headline the Dance tent.

St John’s Ents Officer George Johnston told The Tab: “We’re extremely chuffed to have booked one of the hottest d’n’b and Dubstep producers of 2011.”

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RWOFKy7sHX0

Johnston has also been whetting our appetite with clues about who else will be appearing on their line up. He told The Tab that 483 performers from 87 acts will perform over 9 stages throughout the night.

Johnston also dropped several hints about who will top the bill, saying the headline and support act are both multi-platinum selling artists who are playing at Glastonbury this year.

He also said that the 3rd band on the bill were last year nominated for an Ivor Novello award, played Glastonbury and have appeared on Jools Holland. By our reckoning that narrows it down to La Roux, The Leisure Society or Patch William, although according to this list none of them have appeared on Jools Holland.

Could it be Patch William at John’s?


Thursday, 2 June, 12.55

Earlier today, we revealed that Cascada will headline Trinity, but we want to know what YOU think about them topping the bill at one of Cambridge’s biggest May Balls. Take our poll below…

Thursday, 2 June, 7.30

Eurodance group Cascada look likely to take the top spot at Trinity.

Rumours that the German group will headline have been flying around Trinity for the past few weeks, but it became official when the band posted the gig on their French website.

Mon Dieu! Cascada let the cat out of the bag

Cascada are most famous for their hit singles “Every Time We Touch” and “Evacuate The Dance Floor”, and have sold over 20 million copies worldwide.

Last year’s headliners Wheatus and Alphabeat were a disappointment to some, so lets hope Cascada are more of a hit this year.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-uDixD4tXXU

Despite confirming the gig, things might have fallen through. Cascada have recently cancelled all their UK tour dates in June due to “unforeseen circumstances.” Whether Trinity also got the chop is unclear. Keeping checking the blog to find out whether they’ll be there or not!

Wednesday, 1 June, 20.45

Some juicy behind the scenes gossip for you today. We’ve learnt that The Streets were booked to headline St John’s May Ball but had to pull out. The gig was confirmed at the beginning of Lent term, but in March The Streets’ managers reportedly sent an email to St John’s simply saying “this won’t work.”

John’s May Ball Ents Officer George Johnston told The Tab: “We were initially disappointed to have The Streets drop out on us, but fortunately we’ve been able to find a far more exciting and unique main act that will be in keeping with the prestigious nature of the 500th anniversary of the college.”

Emerging dance artist Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaurs was also booked to headline the John’s Dance tent, but had to pull out after he was offered a slot supporting Fatboy Slim at Ibiza Rocks on the same night. Johnston was similarly unfazed by the collapse of this booking, saying: “Obviously TEED is a great up and coming artist, but the headline DJ we have managed to secure is currently the most respected DJ in his genre internationally. There’s always the 501st for TEED.

Tuesday, May 31, 17.50

No big names to reveal today, so we thought you’d bring you a round up of some of the supporting acts that are confirmed.

Psychedelic United Vibrations will be supporting Tinchy Stryder at Clare May Ball according to their Myspace, and Balkan brass band mavericks Orkestra Del Sol will be bringing their unique brand of ‘honkstep’ to Emmanuel.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XYbSnOrDaWI

Up and coming drum and bass producer Culture Shock has also announced he’ll be coming to Cambridge on the 22nd, meaning he’ll be appearing at either King’s, Magdalene, Pembroke or Trinity Hall. Our guess is it’ll be King’s given their love of banging beats, but we’ll have to wait and see.

Meanwhile, reggae band By The Rivers, who are supporting The Specials on their UK tour, will be at Homerton along side Does It Offend You, Yeah?

Finally, Ayah, an up and coming vocalist who sang on Calvin Harris’ Flashback, will be playing St John’s.

Keep checking back to find out all the acts as they’re confirmed, and don’t forget that you can let us know any rumours you hear at mayballwhispers@cambridgetab.co.uk.

Sunday, 29th, 09.14

Nero, the band not the emperor, will headline this year’s Trinity Hall June Event.

Dance act Nero announced they would play Trinity Hall’s ‘In Technicolour’ June Event on their Myspace page, and it is likely they will be the headline act.

Nero, the stage name of producers Dan Stephens and Joe Ray, and vocalist Alana, were featured on the BBC’s Sound of 2011 list and are releasing their debut album later this year. Nero make dubstep and drum and bass, and their recent single ‘Guilt’ debuted at number 8 in the charts.

June Event Pres James Bousher remains tight lipped about Nero’s exact billing. He told The Tab: “As is tradition, we will not be confirming any of our main acts yet. However, we can promise that guests will be treated to a brilliant night of some of the best music around.”

Ticket holders have reacted well to the news that Nero will be playing. Tit Hall fresher Max Nelki Gopfert said: “I’m pretty excited for Nero. It’s nice to have some dubstep at Trinity Hall rather than just hearing it from Clare Cellars.”

Richard Eggleston, a 3rd year geographer going to the June Event, said: “When I first heard the name, I was absolutely buzzing. I couldn’t believe that they managed to get a name that big at a June event!”

But he added: “Then, when I found out it wasn’t Ne-yo, I was pretty disappointed.”

Friday, 27th May, 22.25

Electro-rock band Does It Offend You, Yeah? are rumoured to be headlining this year’s Homerton May Ball.

Supporting act The Gin Riots tell their 4 fans the big news.

The rumour that the band will headline Homerton’s Camelot themed Ball has been circulating Homerton for the past few weeks, but organisers won’t confirm if its true. Ents Officer Josh Dale said: “Unfortunately at this stage we are unable to confirm any acts from our line up.

“We can, however, reveal that negotiations with Rebecca Black broke down due to the logistical impossibility of moving the date of our Ball from Thursday to Friday.”

Does It Offend You, Yeah?, whose name is a quotation from The Office, released their second album in March and it peaked at number 3 in the UK dance charts.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qOHg-2ZtGl8

Does It Offend You, Yeah?- We Are Rockstars

If the rumour does prove to be true, students could be in for an eventful live show. At a gig in Hollywood in 2008, lead singer James Rushent broke his leg crowd surfing, but still managed to play an encore before being rushed to hospital.

Niall Quinn, a 2nd year engineer at Homerton, said: “They have pretty high energy tunes and I’ve heard they give pretty raucous live shows, but not really to my taste, more music festival less May Ball.”

Keep checking the blog to see if the rumour has any (broken) legs…

Wednesday, 25th May, 23.24

Heavyweight dance DJ Foamo looks likely to play this years King’s Affair.

The DJ and producer from High Wycombe listed the gig on his Myspace, and will be playing Ibiza just 3 days before treating the iconic King’s Chapel to some fidget house.

Jon Brown, one of the Music Co-ordinators for King’s Affair said: “As with any other may balls details of all acts are kept secret until the night of the event. Any details that are not released in an official King’s Affair statement should be regarded as speculation.”

King’s are renown for securing top dance acts to bring big beats and heavy basslines to the college. Last year zeitgeist dubstep producer Joy Orbison was joined by Cambridge’s very own drum and bass pioneer Logistics.

This year’s line up looks equally solid. Along with Foamo, hipster DJs xxxy and Girl Unit have also both confirmed on their websites that they will play.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tqAB8kAUrrM

xxxy – Ordinary Things

Meanwhile, will up and coming indie bands Joy Formidable and Everything Everything be playing King’s Affair? Belfast band ‘A Plastic Rose’, who are booked to play the event, listed the two bands as also appearing at the event.

But Patrick Kane, King’s Affair’s Music Co-ordinator, told us: “I can categorically deny that Everything Everything and Joy Formidable are performing at the King’s Affair 2011. We have a damn good lineup covering all tastes in music, and all will be revealed at 6pm on the day of the King’s Affair.”

We don’t know what to think. Either A Plastic Rose got their wires crossed, or a deal with Everything Everything and The Joy Formidable fell through. Or maybe King’s are just bluffing us!

Tuesday, 24th May, 12.03

Queens’ students have shows mixed reactions to the news that Bombay Bicycle Club may be headlining their ball.

Upon hearing the rumour, third year student Steph Edwards told The Tab: “I’m so excited if it’s BBC. The Ents team has a hard job to live up to Florence and the Machine last year, but I think they’ve got it under control. Disappointed it’s not Kanye though…”

But, fresher Sophie Hoare hasn’t heard of the band before hearing the rumours: “I hadn’t actually listened to the band before!” She added: “But I know Queens’ is famous for getting up-and-coming acts, so I have high expectations. They sound good.”

Keep checking back for more May Ball updates…

Monday, 23rd May, 18.00

Bombay Bicycle Club are rumoured to be headlining Queens’ May Ball, according to sources close to the band.

A source close to BBC confirmed that the band are set to play at Queen’s on 21st June, before saying: “Oh shit, I shouldn’t have told you that.” The Queens’ May Ball committee refused to confirm or deny anything.

Queens’ have a reputation for booking big acts, with previous performers including: Florence and the Machine, Klaxons, and Kaiser Chiefs. And the BBC boys are certainly no strangers to the university scene, having headlined Bournemouth’s Summer Ball last year.

BBC’s second album Flaws entered the official album chart at number eight, and the band were named ‘Best New Band’ in 2010 by NME, beating La Roux and Mumford & Sons. The boys are set to release their third album later this year.

Their appearance at Queens’ will follow a tour of Europe, which culminates in Amsterdam just two days before the ball.

READ: The Tab’s interview with Bombay Bicycle Club here.

21.57

Rumours are flying around and The Tab comments section seems to be the place for them. Here are some of our favourites so far:

18:30

Corpus Christi released 100 extra tickets to their ‘Distant Shores’ themed May Ball this afternoon.

Corpus’ May Ball Pres Will Cook told The Tab they: “always planned to release more tickets if possible after finalising final numbers of workers and performers, and we’re delighted to be able to put 100 more tickets on sale.

“The first release sold out in minutes back in January, so this really is the last chance to get your hands on some of this year’s most sought-after tickets.

“This year’s Corpus May Ball promises to build on the successes of previous years. Not only will it prove that small really is beautiful, but you can also look forward to entertainment, food and drink to match the biggest May Week events.”

Click HERE to get yourself a ticket before they’re all gone again!

Sunday, 22nd May, 00:05

The final results are in. LOT 3 sold at £1600 to a student from Christ’s. ‘It will be an unforgettable night’ he says.

EACH – East Anglia Children’s Care – describe how £328 funds an in-house Day Care session in one of their hospices lasting 8 hours. That’s a few of those then.

The total sum raised by the auction is an impressive £6200 – over twice the amount any ball has ever donated in the past. Now John’s just has to make these huge sums worth it.

Keep checking The Tab for all the news on line ups and committee fuck ups.

12:16

Unbelievable. The auction was under £1000 with ten minutes to go, and then, whoosh. Four bidders battled it out, with the tickets changing hands multiple times in the last minute. It finished on a staggering £2050. We reckon that’s the first time in history a May Ball ticket has sold for over £1000.

The winner, who wants to remain anonymous, fills us in on her motivations for bidding: ‘I didn’t really have a figure in mind’, she says.

‘My funds are not limitless but I have saved my 21st birthday money in order to buy these! I’m actually a student: it’s more than I’ve ever spent in my life, but I wanted to thank my boyfriend for helping me through a tough few years, and to end my time at Cambridge on a once in a lifetime experience.

‘I don’t think I can justify spending so much again when I’m working. St. John’s is a beautiful ball anyway, and one that I have watched from the river for the past two years.

‘It might be perceived as stupid to spend so much on one night but if what happened in first year has taught me anything, it’s that seizing the moment is essential.

‘The fact that the money goes to charity is, I’m afraid, not as big a priority. It’s an added bonus of course, but if I’m being completely honest this is a selfish purchase, otherwise I’d just give the money to charity! That sounds bad right? It’s true though.’

Congratulations to her. More later.

Saturday 21st May, 10:55

Morning. LOT 2 ends in just over an hour – it’s currently at £840. We’ve heard from the committee that they expect it to make at least as much per ticket as last night’s auction. We’ve also got a teaser from President Dom Collingwood: ‘We’ll be serving 27,264 portions of food, over 40,000 drinks, and a Cambridge eatery favourite are setting up a restaurant on the Backs’. Obviously pretty exact on the portion control then.

Your guesses last night left a bit to be desired. ‘They’re going to sell for £4025. Don’t ask how I know. Over and out’, said Astrologist. Thom via email reckoned £3000. That bottle of Lambrini champagne is still up for grabs.

00:15

It’s all over. LOT 1 has sold for a tidy £2550 – over £600 a ticket. We’ll hopefully be talking to the winning bidder in the morning, as well as reaction from the committee.

23:45

We’ve got another new bidder at £2150. ‘I will pay a lot of money for these tickets’, he says. Gulp.

23:29

Wow. The price for the pairs have just leapt to £2050. More importantly, one recent bidder’s past items include a ukulele, a golf glove (left), and a darts trophy (engraved). We’ve got no idea either.

Any guesses of the final price to news@cambridgetab.co.uk in the next half hour. Anyone within £50 wins a bottle of champagne (warning: may not actually be champagne).

23:15

BOOM. We have a new high bidder for LOT 1. He’s new to eBay, but he ain’t messing around: it’s now at £1400. This is going to go big.

22:25

Only £40 has been added. SOS Education Coordinator, Helen Elmerstig gleefully encourages you all: ‘Dig deep everyone! It’s not just a fun night for you that you’re bidding for, but also the futures of children, families and communities in Zambia!’ Motivational stuff.

19:59

LOT 1 has had a lot more interest and has now reached £1240 for the 2 pairs of tickets. With 50 now watching the auction it’ll be an exciting evening.

For charity £1000 would cover income generating activities for 10 families in the nearby communities for one year. An extra £500 would provide medical care for 10 SOS families in the Children’s Village for one year. It’s exam term anyway, you’ve been saving money for weeks now.

Friday 20th May, 16:40

Big spenders, welcome. We’ve got plenty of May Ball action coming up over the next few days, but for now, a quick re-cap of where we’re at with these auctions.

For the next 48 hours, we’ll be covering the end of the John’s charity auction, which looks set to raises thousands of pounds for a number of worthy causes. The items up for sale are:

LOT 12 pairs; ends 21st May 00:13, supporting SOS Children

LOT 21 pair with fast-track entry; ends 21st May 12:03, supporting Chernobyl Children’s Lifeline

LOT 31 pair with with formal breakfast; ends 22nd May 00:03, supporting East Anglia’s Childrens’ Hospices (EACH)

LOT 1, which ends at midnight tonight, is currently at a cool £920, with LOT 2 at £770, and LOT 3 at £750. We make that to be £2440, although maths isn’t our strong point.

Bidders so far have been a mixture of students and shadowy proxy bidders, who refuse to be identified (no joke). The current highest bidder for LOT 2, however, told us she was buying them as an ‘extravagant gift’ for her boyfriend’s birthday. Bless her. It’s currently being watched by 38 people, however, so it could end up being very extravagant indeed.

In other news, here’s what we’ve already told you regarding line-ups: Tinchy Stryder looks likely to headline Clare’s “Curiouser & Curiouser” themed Ball, while one of Chase & Status will perform a headlining DJ set at Downing’s “Olympus” themed event. Jakwob will also be playing Robinson’s “Guardian’s Of The Realm” May Ball, but will not be headlining.

We’ll be releasing a couple of big stories some time tomorrow. Be sure to check back then.

  • Astrologist.

    They're going to sell for £4025. Don't ask how I know. Over and out.

    • http://tinyurl.com/2g9mqh Drew Peacock

      I think you just mean 'Out'. over and out is Hollywood bullshit

  • Robin

    Reading this blog is one of the dullest things I've done all day. I've had a really dull day.

    • Batman

      cheer up pal

      • Spiderman

        Know how you feel guys, there really ain't much shit going down these days

        • Analyst

          How to kill a comment with Spiderman.

  • The Bear

    Chipmunk and Erol Alkan are at Johns. This is true.

    • Clare Ents

      I fucking wish this was John's line up. Unfortunately, I know that they nicked Example straight out of our hands as their headliner… Pretty sure Wretch 32 is the support. Hadn't heard they'd booked Erol – I thought they'd got TC. Oh well, pretty even either way…

      • fan

        TC? Top Cat's going to be at John's? Now I'm jealous…

      • The Popo

        Clare Ents you know nothing. John's found Tupac in Belize and booked him for the ball.

      • Cooper

        John's was definitely on TCs myspace last time I checked… shame though, Erol is amazing

  • Fact

    You can't buy the privilege to be at John's – It's priceless. Any chat about 'I'd rather be at Oxford'… We'd rather you were too.

  • Johnian

    I can't believe a student just spent £2k on a double ticket! If she had got her act together and asked around a couple of months ago I know loads of Johnians who were looking for someone to sell the second half of their ticket to for cost or just over cost price. Crazy- Definitely more money than sense…

    • hmmm

      leave off, she's not hurting anyone

    • winner

      didn't know this, otherwise would've done it this way! i won £1500 on a scratchcard, so that was free money. the rest was from savings…i thought why not. it is silly money but i don't regret it…

      • Ryan Giggs

        There is no sense in saying just because you got £1500 from a scratchcard you should just spaff it up the wall.

        • Cummon sense

          Exactly, it would make much more sense to invest the £1500 and spaff up the wall

      • Johnian in debt

        Next time ask me and I'll sort you out for £2049

    • 2012 anger

      If you think about it the Olympic opening ceremony, lasting less than a may ball, top tier tickets cost £2012 per ticket. Not saying May Ball is worth the same but 500 year centenary comes round less often than the Olympics…

  • Pictures

    I want them. I don't care how, but i want pictures of may balls, yeah.

  • Alex M

    I could have sold my pair of trinity tickets for £2400, so thats nothing

  • Sign on

    It's not about the money. It's about the college. Boom

    • well said!

  • Corpus…

    …students are doing direct swaps for John's tickets. Meaning they're paying £118 a pop. Sure makes the girl who paid nearly 20 times that look a bit stupid.

    • Come on…

      Why would anyone swap a John's ticket for Corpus?

  • Sam

    speaking of johns tickets, if anyone fancies swapping 2 for 2 queens dining tickets, let me know

    • Lol.

      Naaaaa

    • Sign on

      That's about as fair a swap as a ferrari for a vauxhall corsa, the latter being a Queens' ticket.

    • You are

      a jibson

  • The Tab

    …has perfected time travel.

  • lou

    We reckon that’s the first time in history a May Ball ticket has sold for over £1000.

    ..on what is this based? muppets.

    • Clare Ents

      Time magazine (Varsity)

      • lou

        i'm glad someone else sees the irony

  • John Milton

    Quoth I , "let's to May Ball,
    O maiden of mine,
    I will put up monies,
    And bid for the prize —

    Only promise me,
    That once supplied with ticket,
    You'll unlace my codpiece,
    And find it — and lick it —"

  • UPC4LIFE

    I'm going to Johns AND Magdalene. Its going to be brap brap brap

    • LOL

      pipe down Keeney!

    • SW1

      I really, really, doubt that it will be like this.

  • Jesuan

    Hearing rumours of Jedward at Jesus

    • SOS

      THAT would be a waste of money

      • Nah you're wrong

        False.

  • Tony Wilson

    BBC? Odd, I heard The Vaccines were headlining Queens.

  • Careless Whisper

    Bombay Bicycle Club strongly rumoured to be headlining Magdalene too. Embarassing.

    • Gaga

      Well that's just flat out lie.

  • Fitz Soundcheck

    If I can get Bombay Bicycle Club, anyone can.

    • where is fitz?

      dj set mate, calm down

    • Pav

      If Carlsberg did shit ents…

      • Basics

        If Tesco's Basics Bitter did ents and designed colleges, they'd still have probably done better than the shit-hole you inhabit son!

    • Trash

      Where'd all the men go?

    • Old College

      there's a big difference between a single-member DJ set a full live performance from the band
      – ask downing.

      • perspective

        look on chase & status website at where they're doing live sets. isle of wight, glastonbury, wireless, t in the park, oxegen, benicassim… bit bigger than a may ball no?

        • Old College

          no that's fair, just chase (Dj set) being the main headliner would have actually been a bit disappointing. By the sounds of it they've also got darwin deez,

  • Michael Bradley

    I heard Johns have booked Magnetic Man

    • Cheapskates

      MM want £30k for a May Ball set. Would have thought John's would splash out more.

  • DOWNgrade

    one half of the duo, not even playing live….

  • Smug performer

    I paid £90 for my John's ticket and get to sing at the ball…

    • Bitter reject

      Godammnit

    • I KNOW WHO YOU ARE

      And I'm gonna ignore you… on purpose!

  • DOWNgraded

    Magnetic Man are a trio dickwad

    • Come on now

      They were clearly talking about Chase & Status, even I got the pun and I'm do History of Art

  • Queens' Student

    Not Fleetwood Mac at Queens'???

    • Murray

      Rumours? Na it's all true.

  • kings sucks

    That video of 'xxy' is just shit. I know you will all convince yourselves it's cool because the nme or someone says so but there's nothing to it. It's the same generic, shit electronic music you can hear anywhere.

    • Sam

      so you don't like future garage, big fucking deal. get over yourself

  • CIA

    John's have Glee. I repeat, John's have Glee.

    • glee wtf

      JOHNS BETTER NOT GET GLEE. i did not pay 150 to see thatttt……

      • dontstopbelieving

        you'd better believe it

    • Shit Bollocks

      What a load of bollocks.

    • Frank

      FUCK! She's massive at the minute. I knew John's had something special planned but this is just another level.

  • Vatican circular

    The Pope is doing a DJ set at Trinity

  • Juan Sheet

    first of all, XXXY a hipster DJ?

    REALLY?

    HIPSTER?

    Also, United Vibrations are playing Clare http://www.myspace.com/unitedvibrations

    and Cut A Shine are playing Clare as well.

  • Itsthetruth

    It's Mumford and Sons at John's. Don't ask me who told me.

  • yoyo
  • Max Mather

    I want to know what Steph Edwards would like to see in may week.

  • Yeah, offended

    Seen Does It Offend You, Yeah? twice: when they were supporting someone else and early in the day at a festival. They were really nothing special at all, and their best song was a Devo cover. Fair enough if they were really popular and a load of other people are into them, but… they aren't. Maybe if we were still in 2007 this would have been a half decent choice?

    • country boy

      Having also seen them twice I'm going to have to completely disagree.
      I saw them support the cribs when they were just starting out and they blew the doors off the place, then saw them headline the festival republic tent at Leeds and, again, they had the whole tent jumping.
      Granted, seeing them in daylight may not have quite the same effect…

    • unoriginal caption

      thi is bullshit

      they were by far my favourite act of bestival 2009 which also had pendulum prodigy armin van buuren etc.

      i think theyd be ideal

      • But

        you clearly have poor taste. Next, please.

    • Not offended

      I saw them, they were okay, nothing special

  • Correction Please

    "Does It Offend You, Yeah?, whose name is a quote from The Office, released their second album in March and it peaked at number 3 in the UK dance charts."

    – 'quote' is a verb; quotation is the noun.

    • Countdown Winner '86

      Dictionary disagrees:

      Quote
      n.
      1. Informal – quotation

    • conor

      haha u gt merked bel end

  • myspace

    providing a platform for artists stupidity every day

  • nutkinson

    mumford & sons at johns.

    • Marcus

      yeah, its not…

  • Johnian

    Whoever had the idea to book the Streets for Johns is a complete retard. What a horrible headliner

    • Johnian also

      Totally agree- very glad they dropped out!

  • Old College

    downing have darwin deez

  • Gashcada

    Trinity ents, sort your life out.

  • Boring

    Trinity showing that they're as out-of-date as ever by booking Cascada then…

    • interesting

      this is bullshit.

      that they've managed to stay on the scene for longer than similar artists is testament to their popularity. i'm hardly a die hard fan, but off the top of my head i can think of 5 songs of their's that i would call classics, in that they've stood the test of time.

      i don't doubt that tinie tempah will be churning out some half baked lyrics over a synth background but i do doubt that his earlier singles will be revered in such favourable light as 'everytime we touch'

      • Disappointed

        I very much doubt most people could ever class any of Cascada's songs as "classics". Sure we grew up with them when we were teenagers, but I wouldn't say it is music from my teenage years that I would associate with good memories/times. I tend to more think of genuine one hit wonder classics like Wheatus with Teenage Dirtbag.

        All the same, this is just going to turn the ball into Cindies, which is not what I wanted to be honest (as I can imagine might be the case for quite a few people). The sad thing is they probably spent quite a bit of money getting Cascada which would have been better spent elsewhere, even if it meant less well known bands

        • exstatic

          go to another ball then loser

  • Spoilsport

    Dark Sky at King's, James B. Partridge at King's, Downing, Homerton.

    • Stuck in the past…

      Mate, Dark Sky was so last year. Unlikely they would book the same people twice.

  • Arcadian

    Some guy called ' TC' is booked for *something* at John's. http://www.repriseagency.com/artists/tc

    • Tactical Chunder

      21-06-2011 – St John’s May Ball 2011 @ St. Johns College , Cambridge

      Wow you're actually right. Never heard of TC though. Any good?

      • Sam

        drum & bass guy, remixed riverside and rude boy, those are the only ones I can remember off the top of my head… not too bad, youtube them

      • where's my mone
  • Porphyro

    The Cascada picture is incredibly fake.

  • Queen

    WTF?
    Trinity get Cascada and we are stuck with bombay bollocks :(

    • King

      i thought gay people were supposed to have taste?

  • Nah Mate

    TC did a months-late Rihanna remix this year, nothing else of note. Irrelevant. Certainly not still a leading producer.

  • Leakmaster

    John's also have somebody called 'Aya', according to Songkick.com
    http://www.songkick.com/concerts/9186746-ayah-at-http://www.ayahmusic.com/

    • Realmaster

      Not only are you very, very slow with your observation, Leakmaster, but you didn't even spell 'Ayah' correctly.

  • Georgie JJ

    Johns have Big Boi from Outkast. I repeat Johns have Big Boi from Outkast.

  • Beef anyone?

    TC is definitely being blown up to be a big deal. He really isn't. Ayah looks shit too. Would rather see Cascada.

    • Wait a second…

      Maybe because neither are in their top 3 performers?

  • Quick Search

    La Roux was booked for Jools Holland but pulled out, perhaps that is what they were referring to.

  • 2+2

    Darwin Deez is playing glasto…

    • But..

      But he's not multiplatinum and wasn't nominated for an Ivor Novello last year so he wouldn't be one of the top 3 at Johns. Unless they have huge acts seems unlikely he'd be lower than third on the bill.

  • radar detector

    I LOVE DARWIN DEEZ

  • step up

    la roux played the junction. lame.

    • chill out

      So did chase and status

      • step up

        also lame

  • Johnian

    If it ends up genuinely coming down to La Roux, Patch William or The Leisure Society, I'll be pretty disappointed.

  • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1kUKFFTI0q4

    Paulo Nuntini was on Jools Holland… was nominated for Ivor Novello last year and is at Glastonbury this year. Tab, that took me about 10 minutes on the Internet. Get better at reporting.

    • But..

      He's not a band though. The top two are bands.

  • Queens' Committee

    Queens' TURNED DOWN La Rouz in 2009 after finding Florence. Johns 2 years behind the game.

    • Eww

      You turned down La Roux for Florence and the Machine?
      WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?

  • Johnian

    "3rd band on the bill were last year nominated for an Ivor Novello award, played Glastonbury and have appeared on Jools Holland" – Bat For Lashes?

  • bob

    wants some foals, bloc party or arctic monkeysss

  • I did hear the Corpus Ents committee a couple of weeks ago talking in code about trying to get "W" and that "W" were also in negotiation with Johns.WHAM at Corpus?!

    • Corpmuscle

      Please fucking not Wham – I'd might have to slap those cunts if they turn up

  • Excite

    Has heard from a source within Johns that The Darkness may be playing at their May Ball. You heard it here first

  • HelloWorld

    There is a pretty convenient gap in the Kaiser Chiefs Tour schedule, and they would be in GB at the time, and they're playing Glastonbury…. Johns?

    • keep up

      again, Queens' is one step ahead – they had Kaisers 4 years ago when they were at the top of their game

  • EXTRA EXTRA

    MARSHAL MATHERS AT MAGDALENE

  • can't contain myself

    THIS IS ALL SO FUCKING EXCITING

  • Nothing Special

    6?! Some of us are playing 7 and had to turn down others…

    • Slacker

      If you ain't into double figures, you're really not trying hard enough.

      • almost finished

        21's the highest I've heard – with two different bands though…

  • Lou Watts

    Chumbawumba are multi-platinum and playing Glasto (Y)

  • john's dom

    kings of leon at john's.. confirmed last night.. check their website!

  • Alexis

    Six May balls big deal, George "Lame-inator" Lamb is playing at 7.

  • Johnian J

    Seriously Jessie J? What a bitch

    • jesse

      nobooody's perfect, no no, no no no no..

  • nu metal

    LIMP BIZKIT

  • Harry

    King Charles? Pffft, I heard John's have got Prince Philip doing standup

    • William

      The money I would pay to see that…

  • Better

    King Charles needs a fucking haircut.

  • BIG SEBBY DEE

    Back in the bridge. Thawts?

  • Johnian

    Crap line-up for Johns, half of a band who had a couple of hits years ago and its barely of note on the current music scene. The worst headline act of the last few years and very disappointing for the 500th. Combine this with the horrible posters that looked like they'd been designed by a ten year old I'm not confident this committee is going to give us anything like what this year has been hyped up to be

    • try again

      big boi had a massive solo album, I don't think he deserves to be written off as just 'one half of a band', who didn't just have a couple of hits – they were incredibly innovative and produced some excellent material. try looking past the usual shit bookings like chase & status and jessie j

      • dunnnnn kno

        Johnian you dun kno the dun knooo

      • … No

        "Massive solo album" that got to #80 on the UK album chart… meaning it sold around 2,500 units tops. I've known ADC shows that have sold better.

        • r u dumb blut

          'massive solo album' that got to #3 in the US, with Outkast selling 23 mil in the US alone. if you want to quote stats and sales at least get it right

  • hmm

    Wow, THAT's impressive Johns. Fucking Excited..

  • Truth

    Andre 3000 is better

  • big boi

    i'm no gaga…

  • Smug

    Got to feel sorry for the people who paid over the basic price for a John's ticket now. Glad I'm not going

    • Ignorance

      You're right, £150 is definitely not the standard price for a Ball ticket this year what with Trinity and Magdalene being identically priced… Even if you don't like Big Boi, you're just one of the many ignorant pricks who have both failed to get a ticket, and think that a whole Ball is based on music – piss off to a festival if that's what you want…

      • Non-hater not hating

        Actually, I never even tried to get a ticket, as I knew that it wouldn't be worth the money Johnian's would charge. Also, while a ball is not based on music, it does provide a major part of the entertainment-hence the "headliner".

        I think you are just getting a bit defensive as you realise you have the wrong half of outkast.

  • Y'what?

    Who? I thought the headline act was meant to be the one we'd heard of.

    • try again

      get out more then

      • Try again try again

        Sorry, are we meant to have heard of people who've never had a top 30 hit in the UK? Whose last album got to the dizzying heights of #80 over here? Outkast, perhaps, would have been more credible, but even they weren't what I'd call a big enough name to have memorised any more than Andre 3000's name.

  • George Johnston

    Haters gon' hate.

  • wind up?

    Actually, if you take the time to listen to the acts Johns have booked, you can see how much time and effort has gone into getting some really good music. No, the headliner is not the big steal I'd have hoped for, but I might suggest that the rest of the lineup makes up for it. Only sorry for those who music tastes are indie or pop – it's going to be a COOL ball.

    • dunnnnn kno

      sorry what? hes headlining glastonbury, can you get bigger? listen to some real fucking music, if anyone would prefer cascada they are just dumb blud

  • Johnson

    I am so disappointed with the John's acts.

  • dunnnnn kno

    EVERYONE DUN KNO HOW NANG BIG BOIII IS. SUCK A DICK IF YOU DONT. PLATINUM SELLING ART-ISTE AND ALSO MORE IMPORTANTLY PITCHFORK THINK HE THE BIGGEST TING EVA DUN KNO THE DUN KNO BLUD

    • level-headed

      Sssshhh, George.

  • small boi

    big boi is SUCH an odd choice.. he's not that good, not that 'up-and-coming', not that big.. oh wait. it's johns.. that explains

    • dunnnnn kno

      not that big? in terms of record sales and international acclaim I would say hes the biggest booking in recent may ball history

      • vexed

        biggest booking in recent may ball history? get a fucking grip! faithless shit on this and were second on the bill to only stevie wonder at glasto last year

        at least i'm not paying full price for my Johns ticket

  • Jesus H College

    Sidney and Jesus were better last year.

    • Try again

      You seem to be implying that, despite your headliner being John's support a year on, Sidney Ball is better. Could you please explain this to me in a way which doesn't involve you making a complete fool out of yourself.

      • Jesus H College

        Because Sidney had, in Chipmunk, Two Door Cinema Club, Goldie Lookin Chain and, had the stage not collapsed, Toploader, 4 diverse acts that people know and could sing along to. With probably a third of the budget. And their canal blew most other things out of the water, so to speak. The same can be said for Jesus' ents lineup. Didn't say Johns was bad, just don't think it's as good a lineup as the two last year. As I said, more succinctly. Did I make a complete fool out of myself?

  • Disappointed

    There were rumours of Big Boi and Chipmunk flying around. A lot of us definitely thought it was a red herring, to make the real headliners seem amazing in comparison. Shame the rumours were actually true…

  • Ill find her one day

    wtf! even cambridge university law society had LEMAR for their Ball. johns couldnt match that!?!?!

  • Karanfil

    Downing has the best line up so far…

  • BBB

    Anyone not going John's stop crying. John's mayball will be off the hook, especially when we wave to all the haters watching fireworks from punts.

  • Better than big boi

    I m pretty sure that DJ Piez is actually headlining Johns, a real coup by George Johnston.

  • Clare Ents

    So 50% of you think that half of a Chase and Status DJ set will match a set including:

    Shutterbug
    General Patton
    So fresh, so clean
    I like the way you move
    Roses
    MS JACKSON!!

    John's might not have made an obvious booking, nor one that's massive in the UK, but on this occasion Johnston is right. Big Boi is an internationally acclaimed artist. If they'd booked The Streets, they would've had perhaps the best rapper in the UK (maybe Mr Temper now has something to say about that) but in Big Boi, they've got one of the best rappers in the world.

    Well done guys. We smashed you last year, but you've hit back pretty well.

    • Clare Laments

      Three reasons why nobody trusts your judgement on bookings…

      1. Tinchy Stryder
      2. Running Clare Ents into the ground
      3. Tinchy Stryder

      Completely right in it showing up your own ents lineup… so far, and it's Mr Tempah.

    • agreed

      massive agree

  • Correction

    Downing don't have Chase and Status you idiots. They have just half.

    • don't be a dick

      and what do you think eg a razorlight dj set is? or a hot chip dj set? clearly all the members of the band leaning over one set of decks, yeah? get over it, dj sets are hardly ever the whole band.

  • Clare Ents

    And also, Erol Alkan is an inspired choice…

    • EROL

      Erol will destroy that tent

  • NationalExpress

    George Johnston, conducting the John's Music Fail Bus since 2010.

  • Gary Rhodes

    Booking big boi is a huge coup, easily the biggest of recent years. He's half of one of the biggest, most consistently critically acclaimed and best selling rap groups of all time. He's clearly relevant to modern music having just released another critically acclaimed solo album. He's come from the US to play one of only three dates in the UK at John's. So while you are teeny bopping to "boom wob wobba wobba bing bang" by chase and status, the more refined music fans will take in a modern classic in "Ms Jackson."

    • Delia

      bollocks

  • Satisfied

    Fair play George. Tough job, high expectations, and you've probably done as well as you could have done on a very limited budget. Big Boi is big deal. Chipmunk is as big as any other headlining act, and he is our supporting act. Looking forward to the May Ball and glad I've got a ticket.

    • big point

      biiiiiiig point

  • WHAM fan

    Outkast are no doubt musical legends, but it seems a bit like getting Andrew Ridgeley and not George Michael…

  • Elitist

    Forget Johns, the Trinity line-up is absolutely terrible.

    • trinity are shit

      Surprised? They are notoriously terrible at selecting acts. Athlete, for god's sake.

  • Bye ya to Johns

    Anyone else think John's got the wrong half of Outkast? No "Hey ya" for Johns…

  • Come on

    DJ PIEZZZ

  • sigh

    I think it just says it all about the music tastes of cambridge when chase & status (a duo who DJ almost every university ball in the country) are beating big boi (an internationally critically acclaimed hip-hop artist) in a poll asking about the most impressive headline act

    • Sighfail

      Sure Big Boi is more impressive based on originality, but maybe there is a reason Chase & Status play at so many balls i.e. they are popular.

      Hip-hop is not a popular genre in the UK, it is mainly a US genre. Also, to say we should like critically acclaimed artists the whole time would be boring.

      • dun kno

        huge bookings by magdalene may ball though.

      • Critic

        "Hip is not a popular genre in the UK, it is mainly a US Genre"

        Your description of "Hip Hop" here sounds tediously mid 90s, i.e. it's American because it's black. The influence of the genre is enormous and I would place a large bet that hugely popular artists in this country have relied on the genre, from Kanye West's global mastery of the form to Dizzee Rascals grime roots even to dubstep which came out of the fusion of house music, other forms of dance and trip hop beats (guess what that's inspired from). So big cross for you there.

        "To say we should like critically acclaimed artists the whole time would be boring". God, yes it is tedious listening to excellent music that is wonderfully crafted which, in the case of Big Boi, is danceable and really catchy. I'd much rather listen to "Every time we touch" for the gazillionth, soul destroying time.

        To conclude, idiot.

        • sigh

          I would be impressed if you hadn't completely fumbled over the origins of dubstep… it's actually from dub and 2-step. hence the name.

        • Sighfail

          Just because it has inspired other genres does not mean that it is popular in the UK. Also Kanye West is American. There are only a few major artists withing Hip Hop that have received anywhere near the success in the UK as in the US. Many people here will not have heard of Big Boi, and while we all have heard of Outkast, they frankly have managed to get the wrong half of Outkast.

          Also, you sound like someone who actually listens to websites like Pitchfork. Just because critics say its good music doesn't mean we all have to like it. It would be very boring if everyone liked music that critics like, as many genres would disappear as they are not appreciated to the same extents by the critics. Also, I have never said Cascada is amazing, you'd have to be an idiot to think that. So no point trying to use that point against me.

          To conclude, get your own taste in music and stop listening to what critics say

          • sighfailfail

            The point of critics is not simply to highlight the bad but to open peoples eyes to quality music they otherwise wouldn't listen to. Stop being a close-minded twat. Plus liking music from the mainstream and the more underground scenes can be done.

    • Where's status?

      Don't you mean 'Chase'?

  • country boy

    with a name like his, Big Boi will fit in just fine with all the big names at John's

    • Hahahahaha!

      good one…

  • New Concept

    So, basically, the people who like Big Boi think it was a great call, but people with a different opinion don't? I just don't get it…

  • D. E.

    Jesus and Magdalene clearly have the best line-ups.
    Contrary to what some people are saying here, 'big names' completely matter; there is no attention paid to the music being any good because most people will be pissed, so it's all about the pre-ball hype.
    Sorry, but they have stolen your thunder John's.

    • Moose

      This.

    • Clue's in the name

      Big Boi: 21xPlatinum
      Professor Green: 1xGold
      Mystery Jets: Wikipedia doesn't classify

      • Cakes

        You obviously didn't read the comment you replied to. Don't go for the biggest name. Great work Magdalene.

  • Andre 3000

    Let's be honest – it would have been better to have me at johns – I taught little boi how to rap!

  • Wikipedia says

    Outkast have sold over 25 million records. This compares pretty favourably with other big May Ball bookings, including Faithless (15 million). They are huge, and while admittedly Big Boi is not Outkast, he will include several Outkast classics in his set. And the two are not quite a 'band' in the normal sense: Speakerboxxx/The Love Below was two solo albums released together. I don't think it'll feel like a cheap, half-baked version of Outkast.

    • Wikipedia also says

      Firstly, most of those sales were in America. They are huge. In America.
      Secondly, if I were you I wouldn't draw attention to the fact that Speakerboxxx/The Love Below was a pair of solo albums, since its two biggest hits, Hey Ya and Roses, are both Andre 3000 songs.

      • Wikipedia says

        Fair points. I would say they've covered themselves reasonably well though: Chipmunk is big in the UK and is fairly representative of mainstream British 'pop', whereas Big Boi is a huge international star, but will bring something a little unusual to John's. Also, Erol Alkan will tear it up.

    • good point

      It should also be noted that Faithless did not play live, but instead did an extremely watered down 'Faithless Soundsystem' set in which they only played they're big hits such as insomnia for about 1 minute and was therefore largely a disappointment.

      • were you even there?

        are you blind and deaf? i'm fairly sure I have like a 6 minute recording of insomnia – definitely very live (did the massive drum kit not give that away?). Think it was called sound system because rollo wasn't there.

  • Fabrick

    TAB
    Jesus have the fucking SCRATCH PERVERTS
    WHY IS THIS NOT A MAJOR FEATURE. THEY ARE A MAJOR ACT. Much like Pro Green, in fact. Jesus ents officer is to be highly commended this year. Cuts above the rest.

  • Cadenza4Lyf

    WHAT ABOUT CADENZA?!!!

  • Hint

    The Tab may want to check with an Emmanuelite about dinosaurs…

  • sigh

    what the hell is ed bentsi playing at? who on earth let him be may ball ents officer when he ruined clare ents?

    • Nah

      What you talkin' about?

  • Tune
  • Tune
  • Robinson

    was fuckin bouncing in the rain

  • Cinderella

    TEED – fucking incredible billing.
    Ms Dynamite – fucking incredible billing.
    To the larger balls: sort your shit out. Your budget is higher but that doesn't mean you're prohibited from booking these relatively less expensive acts.

  • Ram Sarujan

    The acts at Corpus must either be dreadful and the May Ball Committee is too embarrassed to announce the lineup, or they have had problems with their intended line-up and are scrambling around to fine replacements, or it will be fucking immense. The latter is pretty unlikely! They have made a huge mess of the ball already. Distant Shores? Pretty much identical to the last theme – vague much? And selling queue jump tickets for £20 extra. Hang on a second, but I've already paid £120 to go to this May Ball. We're not made of money.

    • The latter

      Man Like Me
      Wretch
      DJ Luck and MC Neat
      N-Trance

      Fucking immense.
      Pity the Tab didn't bother to review it.

  • Ooooh

    Dressage at John's ball…

  • Shanaka

    really….

    • shanaka

      ^not shanaka

  • Greg Davies

    I would smash her to pieces!

  • Greg Davies

    She is so so beautiful!

  • Johnny Wright

    Do you have any soiled pajamas I could borrow for my dissertation research? Let me know, J

  • peter mallorie

    I never bully people, it is wrong

  • peter mallorie

    especially for such a hot piece of ass

  • tabshit

    shock horror some people have different sexual tastes. let’s laugh at them.

    HAHA HE’S A MAN BUT HE WANTS A BLOWJOB FROM ANOTHER MAN

    IF I LOOK FOR DIVERSE SEXUAL TASTES I FIND THEM. HOW WEIRD IS THAT GUYS????

    • You’re a fucking idiot

      shut the fuck up you idiot. they’re hardly taking the piss out of homosexuals; there’s a difference between being gay and being a pervert.

      • sigh

        having a fetish doesn’t make you a pervert

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