The Tab student news

Throw Him A Bone: Ageing Anarchists Can’t Get It Up

Ageing anarchist Ian Bone’s protest went limp as only 12 middle-aged militants showed up.

The Tab student news

Chunderachievers

Students in Pembroke have been warned not to confuse their ‘waste paper bin for a lavatory’ again.

The Tab student news

Prof Sez Toff Image Just Doesn’t Fitz

The Master of Fitz slammed politically correct politicians for damaging Cambridge’s reputation.

The Tab student news

Top Of The League And Having A Laugh

Cambridge has smashed its rivals, topping the Guardian’s University league tables for the second year.

The Tab student news

JCR Prez Well Hung

Selwyn has passed a motion to ‘venerate’ its JCR president.

The Tab student news

Bonkers Bone To Block Bumps

2000 anarchists are due to descend on the May Bumps next month in protest of Mr ASBO’s move.

The Tab student news

Mr ASBO: A Tab Tribute

Mr. ASBO has finally been moved from the Cam, to the delight of rowers and journos alike.

The Tab student news

Chinese Whispers: 100 Grand to Get You Into Oxbridge

Can’t get into Oxbridge? Here’s a way to win your entry. One thing: it costs 100K.

The Tab student news

No Victories For Student Council Hopefuls

Students lose out in council elections amidst a low turnout.

The Tab student news

Totally Punted

Cantabs are in uproar over a move by Cam Conservators to ban punting under the influence.

The Tab student news

Emma Dilemma: Bashing Bishop Flees Fellows

The Archbish of Canterbury withdrew from the race to be Master of Emma in relation to his controversial stance on gay bishops.

The Tab student news

A.C. FAILING: Prof’s college only for Toffs.

Philosopher’s college faces embarrassment as majority of places go to private school kids.

The Tab student news

Asbo-lute Shambles: Psycho Swan Not Going Anywhere

Rowers are raging as riverside terror and hate figure Mr Asbo is to stay in Cambridge for his own welfare.

The Tab student news

Caius Cans Pasty Plans

The West Cornish Pasty Company try, and fail, to join the unholy trinity of Life, Death and Gardies.

The Tab student news

Upper Class-Holes

Balliol College have a travel grant specifically for Old Etonians so they can get paid to study ‘poor people’.

The Tab student news

House Coming Home

Selwyn have announced that everyone’s favourite grumpy doctor is getting an honorary fellowship.

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